|I think that is a sign your gf does NOT want you to commit suicide. I know it hurts right now. I thought my life was over when I lost my boyfriend to suicide in 2012, but my life has really turned around in a lot of good ways, and yours can too!
Please don't give up on life just yet. You are so young and so much living awaits you. You'll never replace your gf, nor would you want to, but there will be other people that will come into your life. More adventures to be had. It's not over for you yet. Please honor her life by living yours to the fullest. I guarantee she would not want you to take your life!
It helped me to take it one day at a time. Just try to get to the end of the day, and then do it again the next day. If you take it day by day I think it's a lot more manageable. There will be darker moments, but try to ride those out. They will pass. Also, I don't know if it will help you, but I was motivated to know that each day I lived I was one day closer to meeting my boyfriend again.
Big hugs to you! You are in my prayers.