I want to say that I really appreciate this board because from what I've seen, everyone is kind and respectful of each other.
Anyway, sometimes when I feel discouraged and alone, I think back
to a conversation I had with my grandmother about 15 years ago as we were having coffee and pie in a restaurant. She and I are extremely close and I take her out to lunch sometimes on my day off. Unfortunately with having to work weekends sometimes now I don't get to take her out as much as I used to. But on that day, we talked about all the usual stuff, family gossip, etc. Then a thought came to me and I asked her, "Grandma, have you ever sensed Pap being around or trying to contact you?". She said, "No." And I thought that was it but then she totally floored me.
She kind of hesitated and said, "But...". And she told me how, when she was a teenager, she had a dream that her mother came to her. Her mother died when she was a toddler. In the dream, her mother said, "This is your mother. I came to tell you that your father has been hurt." And when my grandma woke up, she found that my great grandfather had been in a bus accident. I guess my great grandfather got pretty banged up. I could tell my grandmother was hesitant to talk about it but I could tell it had an impact on her. She remembered each and every detail 65 years later and I know she would have never lied about it. I also don't believe in some skeptics' claims that they are grief hallucinations because my grandmother was alone in the house and her mother had died many years before, and would not have really had any memory of her. Let alone give her veridical information in a dream. But apparently my great grandmother loved her family so much that she kept watch over everyone. Were it not for my grandma's experience, I think I would be more skeptical of these things, so I was so blessed she shared that and now I'm sharing here to maybe give someone...inspiration? Hope?
Love and blessings to all!